Sad is the new happy

Not long ago (in November, me thinks) a study came out claiming that listening to sad or melancholic music can actually "lift your spirits." According to the study, which was conducted by researchers at the Free University of Berlin, people experience more emotions when listening to sad music than happy music. The emotional roller-coaster that sad music incurs "can improve a person's emotional well-being as well as make us feel at peace and nostalgic." (Daily Mail)

I knew there was a good reason I always felt better after a marathon of melancholic tunes. And tears.

Liila Taruffi and Stefan Koelsch surveyed 722 people across the globe (and no, they didn't just lock them in a room and make them listen to Radiohead all day) to try and understand how they felt after listening to sad or melancholic music. People in Europe and the U.S. said they felt "nostalgic" while listeners in Asia said they felt "at peace."    

Participants, who ranged in age and gender, were asked to identify some of their favourite pieces of sad music. Not surprisingly (to me, anyway), Johnny Cash's interpretation of Nine Inch Nails' Hurt and Radiohead's Street Spirit (Fade Out) are the two songs, with lyrics, that got the most votes.

hurt

street spirit (fade out)

The reason I say "not surprisingly" is because those are two of my guaranteed go-to tunes to get the tears flowing. As for songs without lyrics, Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata got the most votes.

  moonlight sonata

I thought the study was really interesting because I have always been drawn to melancholic music. And I'm a very nostalgic person. I knew I was emotionally complex!

While Radiohead's Street Spirit (Fade Out) is a real downer (in a good way), Everything in it's Right Place is a close second.

everything in it's right place 

Another depressing (in an uplifting way) song I've been listening to a lot lately is Ben Harper's Another Lonely Day. Sniff.

another lonely day

After reading about the study last night, I went looking for some melancholic music. I found a band, and a song, that I've never heard of or heard before but both totally blew my mind (and eyeballs). It reminded me of something that could have been playing when my grandparents first met in Poland.

hungry ghosts, i don't think about you anymore but

Vincent Vallières' On va s'aimer encore is another song that I can't listen to without crying no matter how hard I try.

On va s'aimer encore

I LITERALLY just started crying the second the song started.

And then there's The Stranglers' Golden Brown. Nostalgia indeed.

golden brown

What are some of the sad songs that you enjoy listening to? I'd love to know.

   

People don't change

Or do they?

Lately, I've been thinking about the old adage that pretty much affirms that we are all stuck in our own $%#@ and simply can't change.

I don't buy it. 

Not for one second.

While we may not be able to completely transform deeply ingrained aspects of our person, or personality, I think life is a lesson (or series of lessons) that can teach us a thing or two about ourselves and compel us to improve - for the better.

I think this is what Oprah would call an "Aha moment!"

What first got me thinking about this was a a dream I had about Nicole Richie (yes, you heard me right, I dream about celebrities - but only the ones I consider close friends). 

Ten years ago, she was pretty much a train wreck. 

mug shots

Nowadays, she's sober, married, has two kids, a clothing line, jewellery line, an online series, etc. (I think you get the point I'm trying to make.)  

And I absolutely adore her.

pageant shot

There's a scene in the movie Great Expectations, with Ethan Hawke and Gwyneth Paltrow, where Goop's character Estella states, point blank, "We are who were are, people don't change."

Bull$%#@

Just look at John R. "Johnny" Cash.

After watching Walk the Line last night, I came to the realization that love can sometimes be a huge catalyst for change. Years of druggin' and boozin' took their toll on Johnny Cash but, in the end, love took an even bigger toll.

After helping him get sober, June Carter spent 35 years with the man in black. They had a child together and when she died in 2003, he pretty much lost the will to live... and died four months later - of a broken heart.

So the next time somebody tells you people don't, or can't, change just think of Nicole Richie and Johnny Cash and remember that "lies only exist if we believe in them."